The Muse has returned! And She brought Irish Whiskey and Hope!

When I sat down to write a year end retrospective blog, as I have done every year since I put on my writer’s cap and got to work a few years ago, a flood of memories filled my tired noggin and sent chills of happiness and sadness through me.

2010 has been the epitome of contrasts.  Of so many wonderful new opportunities and of painful losses.  And I know that each and every one of you has been down the same worn path so I guess I needed to share my little tale of the year that was two thousand and ten.

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times” Now, I know I’ve read that some where before- maybe on the back of a Capn’ Crunch.  Bah, anywhos.   It truly was a magical year for me for my writing and artistic career.  On the personal side of things, well, it wasn’t so shiny and happy.

2010 was really good to me when it came to my writing and art career. I will post a bit later about all the really killer projects I have coming out, this blog was more about what a downer the end of last year was and I was prepared to lay the depressive shellac on pretty darn good too until something really amazing happened to me a few days ago.  It’s one of the most extraordinary things that have ever happened to me.

Some of you know some of you don’t, that my Dad passed away the first week of December. Yeah, doesn’t that just reek of Christmas cheer and crap-coated gumdrops and rotted sugar plums?   So as you can guess, it was a miserable times around the Erb Homestead.  Then my already tenuous and pricky Muse decided to flip me the bird and headed south for the Holidays… Trust me, that little witch was slated for boatload of coal in her stocking for sure, until… but that comes a bit later.

I had deadlines and the closer they came, the more I wanted nothing to do with any of it.  I then learned that a friend of mine’s father was in the hospital and not doing well.  I (as well as my brother) grew up hanging at their house and we were really close with the entire family, so can you say “Junk Punch #3”?  I knew you could.  (Say, isn’t that a Beatles tune?) Anyway, so that sent me and my creativity in a dark spiral that made my head spin.

So, being the tough little trooper that I am, I staggered, crawled, and cried my way through the holidays. (God bless Shelly for putting up with me. No easy feat.) As New Year’s Eve approached I tried to look at it like I do every New Year.  A new start. A fresh perspective on life, insert-blah-blah-blah here.  I fine evening was had but I awoke the next day with the same piss-poor feeling as the last six weeks.  Ughghg.

Then I got the call that my friend’s Dad had passed away New Year’s Day morning.  Happy damn New Year huh?

But here’s where that “extraordinary event” happened that I mentioned about thirteen paragraphs ago happened.

I awoke last Tuesday morning feeling like death warmed over and damn surly once again. I was brushing my teeth and staring at my “Chief Thundercloud” face and pleaded to God, the creative muses, hell even my Muse to let my use, to turn the grief and sadness, angry into my art.  Please just let me get passed all this darkness and death and to let my writing be the torch that illuminates the way out.

Well, I think I mumbled something that sounded like, “Yeah, whatever. Like anyone’s listening anyway,” and proceeded with my morning walk with my dogs; Rask and Duchess.  I was mulling over where to go with my short story that was due to the editor by February first then it hit me like an 18 pound sledge hammer!  Now I can’t tell you what it was, however, it was the solution to my story woes as well as my personal woes that have been a dark albatross for the past month or so.

After the walk, (which was probably far too short if you as the pooches) I set to work on my inspiration and later that afternoon, received an email that solidified my new outlook and a much needed confidence booster.

So, no more depressing blogs. (At least for now  ;o) ) I truly believe that positive vibes bring even more positive things.  And I’m pretty damn sure my Dad would want me to stop whining and get my ass back in the chair where it belongs.

So, the next blog you all will read from me will have a list of really great projects and work that I am sure you will dig and I am very proud of.

I even think I saw my Muse take a sip of her Tullamore Dew. 

This witch better be sharing and not leaving any time soon.

Stay tuned in 2011 folks!


-TAE